England is in the throes of a tv revolution
Ten young starters, a weekly eviction the favoured solution
First to go was the female toff, Sada
Was she easy to get on with? Nada
Second to go, was the effervescent Cazza
As bold as brass and as mad as Gazza
So who else is in the house?
Well for one, there is the Irishman Tom, aka Mouse
He’s the strong silent type with mesmerising eyes
There’s also Nick
Who’s made us all sick
With his conniving and lies
Andrew, third out, Mel’s fondness for him grew
And I’m convinced a part of Andrew’s torso did too!
Craig, started out vague
A Ranmbo type, but now he’s a sweetheart
The assault course was the chance for him to act the part
Darren, who started out with a chicken paranoia
Now his love affair with Marjorie will annoy ya
Mel, loves to have the boys give her a massage
As Tom dismounted, what was that looking so large?!
Anna, billed as the lesbian ex-nun
Has proved she’s not short of fun
Nicola, the skinhead hippy
Her arty ideas are ever so dippy
So, what can we learn from ‘Big Brother’?
Let’s learn to love one another!
Olympic Special
Sonia O’Sullivan
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sydney 2000
~~~~~~~~~~~~
She put in a showstopping performance
And she made us all so proud
We downed tools
Left the office
And cheered for her out loud
In her quest for gold
She gave everything she had
With Szabo, in a thrilling chase
But Sonia had to settle for second place
Nonetheless, after all that effort, silver made us glad
And a nation was united
Every lung screamed
Every pair of hands were clapping
It wasn’t quite the gold for which she’d dreamed
But even still, there was plenty of back slapping
And so at last
After so many heartaches
The lovely lass from Cobh
Has an Olympic medal
To add to her treasure trove
Eric the Eel
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eric Moussambani
The hero of the hour
He could do with a few more strokes
And certainly a whole lot more power!
Paula the Crawler
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In the pool we had Paula the Crawler
At least she wasn’t a faller
Unlike the Russian girl on the vault
Though later proved, it really wasn’t her fault!
Olympic Ideals
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sept 2000
~~~~~~~~~
Enter Paula the Crawler
But her stature grew ever taller
Then Eric the eel
Made us realise what we should feel
Just to see them taking part
And showing so much heart
So, no longer
“faster, higher, stronger”
but as the golden tension mounts
remember, it’s the taking part that counts
Underdogs
~~~~~~~~~
Sept 2000
~~~~~~~~~
It’s the underdogs
Who have lifted the fog
Shown us what we most desire
Not demonic drug cheating liars
But competitors who are clean
Their bodies pure and their hearts keen
James Quelly
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sept 2000
~~~~~~~~~
James Quelly
Gave it some welly
Put the pedal to the medal
And lo and behold
He struck gold!
100m Sprint
~~~~~~~~~~~
Sept 2000
~~~~~~~~~
Maurice Greene
The fastest man we've ever seen
From the blocks to the finishing tape he ran
In under 10 seconds, speedy man!
200m Sprint
~~~~~~~~~~~
Sept 2000
~~~~~~~~~
What a triumph, for the Greek
At 200m, he hit his peak
He breasted the finishing tape first
After an astonishing final 50m burst
Deniece Lewis
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sept 2000
~~~~~~~~~
Gold in the heptathlon, what a feat
Seven punishing events, but she won the meet
Coming down the final straight, run off her feet
Her stunning six pack stomach, stuffed with meat!
Stephen Redgrave
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sept 2000
~~~~~~~~~
Forget the "drive for five"
For he rowed to 5-in-a-row
The greatest Olympian alive
What a spectacular and powerful show
The Italians made it a splendid race
But for Stephen it was the same old story
With Matthew, Tim & James, he upped the pace
And then we shared in all their glory
Audley Harrison
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sept 2000
~~~~~~~~~
The Golden pugilistic poet
Great, and don't he know it!
An Under 4's View of the Olympic Sprinting
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sept 2000
~~~~~~~~~
Bums up in the air
On your marks, get set, go
All this Olympic fare
is new to me you know
The Woodies
~~~~~~~~~~~
Sept 2000
~~~~~~~~~
The poor old Woodies
Couldn't bring home the goodies
They had to settle for second best
For so long, better than all the rest
But this time not spritely enough for Gold
And now they're retiring, from feeling old
So, no more hitting tennis balls
But will they return, if duty calls?
********************************************
previously, on Clik the mouse :
********************************************
stuff and nonsense
oblique and askew
if it makes no sense
can I ask you?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ten times round
and then I found
that being too busy
makes you dizzy!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
enjoy your snooze?
d’ya hear the news?
too filled with booze?
‘zat the life you choose?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Smell the coffee
----------------
Finally, my mother will be proud
“My child has made it!”
She’ll trumpet out loud
“A barrister no less
A member of the legal profession”
I guess
Our relationship will worsen
If she ever learns that I’m actually
A barista (coffee person)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Putting Poet
It’s on the green!
And rolling off again
Oh if only I could play like the pro’s
And better still, if only I could write real prose!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Laptop
She’s typing
Into a little magic box
Sitting here next to me on the train
Beautiful, with long, blonde curly locks
I see her adding to her repetitive strain
Would she give me the time of day?
Engage in conversation?
The answer of course is nay
She’s immersed in a different touchy feely sensation
How does she feel about me looking over her shoulder
Peeping, being nosey
With each passing minute I’m getting bolder
But she has no intention of being cosy
Her typing skills
And knowledge of the internet
Sate her thrills
I’ll bet
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I started, though I wish I hadn’t
Imagining myself as a new found poet
My words all set to paint a pageant
Plainly not, and now I know it
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
getting started, that’s the hardest part
and trying to desist from using words like fart
alas, it’s such a temptation
already, I’m suffering from poetic degradation!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
it nearly all passed me by
this hype about a certain young wizard
here I am all ready to cry
stuck in this infernal antartic blizzard
